…are more than the words “I’m sorry.” An apology is a whole process, but there are only four steps!
- Acknowledgement: naming the offense and how it affected the other person.
- Apology: the words “I’m sorry.”
- Promise: yes, these are just more words for now.
- Proof: this is why we tolerate the words.
It’s the proof of promises that breaks the cycle of offense, apology, offense, apology.
It’s the proof that answers the suspicion, “You’re only sorry you got caught.”
It’s the proof that lets forgiveness lead to trust.
It’s the proof that gives the words any meaning. No more empty promises.
Meet with me for suggestions and support with what the heck proof really looks like!
By the way, psychotherapy has been a great example of proof for my clients because it offers consistency. People need proof of consistency to ease the anxiety of “I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.” Without consistency, people can distrust real improvements.
Related tools: Forgiveness and Conflict Resolution Skills.